These things are already reviews of movies that I haven't seen... but in this very special edition of Filmless Review, I write about a movie that I haven't seen based on a book that I owned and never read. You are truly holding the hand of greatness right now.Aren't we all just a little tired of Tom Hanks? I know he won 7 Best Actors in a row or something, but is it that hard to find another semi-normal, non-threatening guy with decent acting chops? I'm not entirely sure (since I didn't read the book or see the movie... duh) but I'm going to go out on a limb and say he has some romantic contact with Audrey Tautou (the scared young woman next to the creepy old dude in the picture) in this one as well. Considering that Tom is like 73 years old now, that's a little creepy. I'm talking Harrison Ford-Calista Flockhart creepy. I could turn this entry into a thing about double standards in Hollywood and how women are pushed out the second they stop looking Botox-fresh while men hang on for Anthonyhopkinsian periods of time...
But I'm no hero
Anyway, there's a movie to review. The trailers are kind of boring, and the incredibly pale Paul Bettany in makeup meant to make him look like an albino monk is simaltenously hilarious and disturbing. I'm also conditioned to believe that any piece of contemporary literature that sells this well is a steaming pile of crap. At the same time, I need to commend anything that gets large religious institutions to launch attacks on artistic works, because I long for a return to the Crusades. We're getting oh so close people. *fingers crossed*
For that, Da Vinci gets my stamp of approval, in the form of this nauseating piece of artwork:
1 comment:
I want to do movie reviews in my blog. But they probably won't be as funny as this. I'm jeolous :?
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